I met you as a baby. You were my sunshine place.

And as a kid I did just about everything around you except for when I went to visit the fam down south and in PA.

We had the best times together even got caught in the rain with you

and since you felt like home I said fuck it, it’s still a great day. So i stretched out my arms, dropped my head and had a laugh or two.

I walked slow, admiring you,

taking you In. Listening to the drops hit my building that looked like it could almost touch the sky.

We rocked heavy together from my house in co-op, to the valley, to white plains road, to gun hill, to Fordham man we were do or die.

I claimed you as mine.

I hung onto you because you were all I knew. My only home. My comfort. All that was important to me was in your hands.

But then the summer of ‘96’ hit and shit got thick.

Moms came back from the mental hospital but still had that tick.

I got pregnant at 12 and moms said I had to get rid of it.

Dad left because he said “your mothers here now, let her deal with this shit,

plus I’m a party animal and I’m getting that itch”.

So now I went deeper inside of you. I found a whole new level.

Fuck school, let’s roam these streets, fist fights and dancing with the devil.

I quit on God. I went dark inside.

And yes, although you were with me the whole time,

Our relationship was changing.

I was retracting. But didn’t realize it.

Then I had a nightmare that darkness took my spirit.

So I blamed you! My home! For introducing me to all this negative shit.

All this dirt, this evil, this filth, I didn’t claim you anymore I wasn’t with it.

You were no longer good for me. No longer my joy.

I figured if I left you I’d find love again. I’d find a new home.

Maybe go north or south or leave the whole country, become a beach bum and sell trinkets to tourists.

But just as I was about to run,

Many others who ran were coming back saying it was no fun.

They screamed that these places they ran to had no life and there was no beat to their drum.

I then wondered if all the trouble that came to me was because of you or because of me?

Was it your streets or my feet?

Did you wish me harm or did I forget to think?

Now Some people say the only thing good you got to offer is that you’re the home of the Yankees.

But after growing older and witnessing all the beautiful people that come from you like Lauren Bacall, Sister Souljah, Chazz Palminteri, JLO, John Patrick Shanley, Daryl Mitchell, Quinton Aaron, Ida Rolf, Michael Delorenzo, Judy Reyes, Kid Capri, Cardi B, my friends and me..

Man how could they even mouth those terrible words?

But most of all, how could I, myself, even think you were ever against me?

Just because of ones bad choices, spilled blood and tears on your beautiful streets,

Doesn’t mean your streets aren’t beautiful.

It doesn’t mean one can’t walk them and experience the time of their lives!

I’ve had many great days with you.

I’ve celebrated all over your turf.

I must admit you weren’t always my favorite borough growing up but you’re now my heart.

You’re home.

I respect you.

I’m currently watching you morph.

You’ve always been here for me.

I’m sorry for doubting you.

So I wrote this to pass the torch.

To those whom have their doubts about my beautiful BRONX.

BX all day baby from my motherfuckin heart.

 

 

*The opinions and ideas expressed are solely those of the author, and may not reflect the opinions of The Bronx Brand*

What Shana Solomon loves most about living in the Bronx is that it’s home. The Bronx has influenced her so much because it is a melting pot of cultures and voices.  She also loves the fact that a lot of these new businesses are owned by people of color. That just inspires and warms her heart.

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